29 August 2009

Why I haven't posted

I realize that I said that I would post on a much more regular basis this time around, and have tried really hard to keep that up. But as it stands now, I have not blogged in over two weeks. I have three really good reasons.


I was so busy getting everything ready for the four hour trip to Aviano where my family would be "living" out of a hotel for an entire week, that I simply did not have that much time to post. Anybody with kids should at least understand that just a little. It's hard enough that I had to make sure that every one packed enough clothes, to include underwear for some of my family, but to also have to make sure that I packed enough entertainment for the kids because we would be in a hotel room for a week. I also had to make sure that Stephen had everything that he was going to need for before, during and after his knee surgery. Then I also had to plan healthy meals, or at least give it my best shot, that could be made in a hotel room with a small kitchenette.

I must say that this trip turned out to be not as bad as I had originally thought. The hotel kitchen was an actual real sized kitchen that even had a dish washer. The kids ended up not being as bored as I thought that they would be. The hotel was full of families which lead to tons of kids for them to play with at the park right outside. And the commissary there was amazing compared to ours in so many ways that I even grocery shopped for the house and carried food back home for four hours in a cooler. I was also able to find shoes in the right sizes for all three of the kids and got all the school shopping done while there.

Stephen's knee surgery went well. The doctor was able to "clean" it up nicely. Although the news he gave us was not so good when he was finished. They scoped his knee in hopes that they would be able to fix it. Which while doing the scope they found that his knee will require much more work and may lead to a full knee replacement one day. The doctor even described the procedure as " putting a patch on a bald tire". But all and all he is healing well now and will begin physical therapy soon.


On returning home from a very long drive home from Aviano, (the drive is 4 hours as is, but we had to stop so that Stephen could get out and stretch his leg as the doc ordered to prevent any blood clots or damage, so it made it much longer of a drive) I was unpacking the car and received a very upsetting phone call. My Mawmaw was in the hospital and the doctors did not think that she was going to make through the night. This was Friday. By Friday night we got a red cross message that said that she was doing even worse and that I should try to come home.

Stephen and I spent many hours and much time talking about how i could get home. We finally came to the decision that there was just no way that I would be able to make that trip. The doctors wouldn't let him fly and I could't leave him here in this house that has four flights of stairs while he was on crutches. The kids needed to stay here so that they would be alright to start school and we just honestly did not have the money for me fly home. I talked to family back home on and off throughout the weekend and did my best to help them keep their spirits up. Mawmaw passed away on Sunday.

I spent Sunday and Monday in a state that I would call isolation. Which because of that I will have to make up Stephen's birthday. (Again, honey I am sorry that this all happened on your birthday) I didnt want to talk about it, think about it or deal with it. i was angry and sad, and confussed all at the same time. It was something that I just could not explain to anyone, not even Stephen. So I kept to my self. Thank God I have such a great family, because they all chipped in to help take care of Daddy and Mommy. The kids even made dinner.

Tuesday, I talked about it, or rather just blurted out everything that I was thinking and feeling and then just left it at that. When I was finally done, I went downstairs and crashed. I slept for pretty much the whole day. At this point, Stephen was able to get up and manage without to much assistance so he gave me my time. I guess he figured that after not sleeping more than 2-3 hours a night since Friday I needed the rest.

Wednesday, between Stephen going to the doctor and helping MR. Robinson, Elizabeth's teacher, get his room ready for school to start and cleaning up around the house from my lack of work earlier in the week, I was able to keep busy and not think too much about the fact that Mawmaw was being burried.

Thursday came around and the kids and I spent that finishing up at the school. We finished moving in all the desks and putting up all the posters and such. AFN our local tv station was there. They followed me around all day filming me doing things in the classroom and stuff. They finished up with an interview with me. i will post a link to the news segment when it is up so you can all see it. Just please keep in mind that I was working all day in the class and trying to help the new staff in the hot cafeteria to get ready for school to start too, so I am incredibly rough looking in this interview. So, be kind!!

Friday was spent at the school for the open house. What should have been a few hour thing ended up taking all day. It was nice to see all the kids again though, I am going to miss them being that I will not be working in the lunch room this year. However, I may still be able to see them if I can work out a volunteer schedule at the school.


I have never felt so tired in my life over the last two weeks and I was having so many mixed emotions over my Mawmaw passing that I just couldn't form any intelligible thoughts.

I am happy to say that I am doing much better now and with the kids starting school on Monday, finally, life will get back to normal soon.

I am truly blessed with a great family. My husband and my kids were so supportive, kind and understanding during this past week that I couldn't have asked for anything more. Even when I was not able to explain to them what exactly I was thinking, feeling or going through, they were there for me. And for the kids, the only thing that they knew to do was to hug me and tell me they me, that ended up being the best medicine anyone could give.


We are all much better and enjoyed the day relaxing after a quick house cleaning and laundry party. Stephen is healing nicely and is able to get around without the crutches for the most part. He will be returning to work on the 2nd barring a good report from the doctor on the 1st. The kids are excited to start school and ready to put their best foot forward this year. Jeremiah is now in middle school, my big sixth grader and Elizabeth has moved up to third grade. Keegan my possibly be able to start a half day pre-k soon. I am going to spend this coming week doing some touch up painting around the house. Maybe even start a project that I have been putting off for awhile which is to re-do a bedroom set.


Leah said...

stace i am so sorry. i wish i could have been there for you. we never talk anymore and i miss you so much. i really wish i could have been a shoulder for you. you were dealing with so much. ((HUGS)) i miss you and i love you.

stace said...

No worries Leah. I am not mad or upset or anything. In fact have been talking to the kids about how much I miss you and with their help, I have come up with a great idea that I will be getting in the mail, this week. And that's a promise!!