25 September 2009

no entries for a few days

I will not make any entries for a few days. I have just pent the better part of the day at the Pisa ER. Today I miscarried our child at 8 weeks. I am feeling fine physically. Emotionally and spiritually, I will need a few days.

I plan to talk to Stephen when I can find the words to say how sorry I am to him that this happened and that I was not able to able to have our baby, but right now I just can't seem to do it. I can't even seem to look at him right now without feeling some kind of shame or guilt.

In a few days, after I have spent some time in deep prayer I will talk to him and we can see if we want to try this again, or just let it go. I wasn't planning on having more kids, but once this one happened, and I walked around for two months knowing that I was carrying a life inside of me, all i can say now is it's different.

1 comment:

Leah said...

((HUGS)) i know i was having a hard time with this because i just wanted YOU to be ok, but i really was looking forward to another neice or nephew. :( i love you both.